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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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| Nothing compares to the feeling that i had when i heard the news. An instantaneous ignition; A spontaneous combustion.
As i picture skin on skin his hands tracing her body (the body that i fell in love with) with lustful intent and non-emotional connection, the small flame
Explodes.
Into something bigger something stronger and more dangerous. Jealousy only stokes the fire and the burning wreckage in my chest cannot be stopped now. Unintentional but unstoppable. Irrational but irreversible.
I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders today. The name is Atlas and i am normally a Titan. But i have been reduced to an unimportant little speck.
But! Said speck has a weapon; Never underestimate fire that has been lit by past love. As much as i would love to use this fire i will restrain my emotions and only let it simmer beneath. the. surface.
Hiding but watching. Elusive but conclusive.
I am Atlas.
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| I find myself wanting to get away. Away from the heartache the trouble the anger and jealousy and sadness.
It is constant and sometimes I am left wondering: on our deepest level, are we friends? In love? Because sometimes it seems like we are
Enemies.
The art of war is not a pretty one. It is not displayed in museums not portrayed in the media as beautiful and not celebrated among artists of any kind.
Fighting oftentimes seems like there is No
Freaking
Point.
What happens when generals get tired of fighting? They can't just quit. Or else they lose the war. And Oh! How important it is to win that war. Oh so important.
But in defeat... what have they got to lose?
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| And yet, i don't care. The Universe needs saving!
I am thinking of calling in sick to work today. Of course, my manager would argue with me and make me bring a doctor's note, but i don't care. And with a few apathetic parting words, i would hang up the phone. Because i am Commander Shepard, and Commander Shepard does whatever the hell he wants to.
Never mind the fact that i look like a skeleton when i smile!
In other news, i got accepted to Northern Arizona University. NAU is located in the North-Western Galactic Arizona Region. Many great space captains have gone there. It is a possibility. But not right now, no! I have no time! The Turian bastards have attacked Earth. This is an act of war.
Time to bust out my assault rifle.
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| My eyes burn right now for so many different reasons. Exhaustion is a key factor, as well as recent emotional stirrings. I am tired. I am tired in general, and tired of so many things. I hardly have the energy to devote to anything i want to anymore.
As it rains here in Scottsdale, for about the third day this entire year, the pitter-patter on my skylight is calming. Soothing, almost to the point where i am ready to collapse. And it just sounds nice. So nice.
I bought this game Mass Effect for my Xbox 360 today. I am a sucker for interactive entertainment, and the outer case of the game was too compelling to resist, whatwith a fresh supply of $20 bills in my wallet. Upon returning home, i placed it into my disc tray with the heavy anticipation that i get whenever i have bought something new (particularly games). I skipped school today just so that i could buy a new game and play it. I needed the day off, you see, and perhaps more than a little time to myself.
I bought the game used at Gamestop, so that i could return it within 7 days as specified by the receipt, if i didn't happen to like it. I am a master of cheating the retail system. And i had heard mixed reviews about Mass Effect, so i didn't want to risk buying it new and having to trade it in and get half of my money back, instead of a full refund. Not only am i a master of cheating the system, but i am also a master of getting my money's worth, you see. So with a wary anticipation, i pressed the close button of the disc tray and the game loaded up.
It is still there, and my 360 has not shut off since i put it in. That was 6 hours ago.
All of the sudden, i find myself captivated; captivated, by a fictional universe that has sucked me in much like a vacuum cleaner sucks in dust. I looked at the clock, and it was 3:30. The next time i looked, it was 9. I have been sucked away from all of my troubles; all of the heartache and problems and trappings of real life. And it is bliss. Simple bliss.
This is why i play games. This is why i get so excited whenever i turn on my Xbox 360.
I am lost. And never before have i felt so much like i know where i am going.
I am going to the Citadel to confront the alien ambassador and put a laser blast through his skull. For I....am Commander Shepard. And i am a Universal Badass.
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